Can Cuddle Therapy *Really* Help Me Stop Feeling So Lonely?

Stressed AF over work? Relationship in disarray? Finances are out of whack? I know just the thing to relax and chill you out: a hug.

I know what you're thinking: what is she talking about? Hugs don't solve problems. And that's slightly true. A hug can't repair a fractured relationship or a dwindling savings account but it can help you feel better. Don't just take my word for it; there’s scientific backing to show that human touch can improve your physical and mental well-being.

These days, we don’t get hugs as frequently as we’d like (or need!). The average millennial in our digital age is grappling with an epidemic of loneliness that worsened during the COVID lockdown and never quite eased up long after restrictions were lifted. Think about it: most of our social interactions consist of long video calls and unending text chains rather than any physical time spent together.

But what if you could book an appointment for a long, comforting hug—the type you'd get from an S.O. or best friend—as part of your self-care routine? With professional cuddling and cuddle therapy, you get this and more.

Ahead, learn more about cuddle therapy, its therapeutic benefits, and what you can expect from a typical session.

What Is Cuddle Therapy?

Cuddle therapy, or touch therapy, is a professional service that provides people with a safe space to enjoy non-sexual physical touch.  

In a cuddle therapy session, a trained professional cuddler (yes, it's a real job!) offers different forms of physical contact, from holding to hugging and hand-holding. During the session, as you hug and hold your cuddler, your body releases oxytocin—the “bonding hormone” linked to your emotions and well-being.

For many dealing with touch deprivation, isolation, attachment issues, or simply a lack of affection in their life, these cuddling encounters can be incredibly healing. The cuddlers create a safe, consenting space for clients to experience human warmth and bonding in a non-sexual way.

How Does It Work?

Before a session, clear boundaries are established and the professional cuddler ensures mutual consent, so you both feel comfortable throughout the session. During your first consultation, you can detail your needs and preferences and request various cuddling positions and methods.

Want your cuddler to sit beside you and only hold your hands? You can do that. Desire more physical contact and need to be held while lying down? That's an option too. Whatever affection needs you have, a professional cuddler certainly can provide.

What Are the Benefits of Professional Cuddling?

Cuddle therapy offers as many benefits for your physical and mental health as traditional therapy. Touch is a powerful tool to release negative emotions held within the body, says Xandria Schaeffer, a cuddle therapist in Philadelphia. The goal for each session is to help you walk away feeling a little bit lighter than when you came in.

​Here is how it can support your physical, emotional, and mental well-being.

Benefits to Your Physical Health

Remember oxytocin? That chemical messenger your body needs to release stress and anxiety? Yeah, physical touch (like cuddle therapy) triggers it. When oxytocin courses through your body, your cortisol—the hormone responsible for physical symptoms of stress like weight gain and fatigue—levels drop.

Getting your regular dose of cuddles and affection is key to maintaining and increasing the oxytocin in your body. And the more oxytocin you have, the better your physical health will be.

Benefits to Your Emotional Well-Being

Being held can do wonders for your emotional well-being. You just feel more content, happier, comforted, and relaxed after getting some cuddles in. Plus, if you’ve just gone through a significant trauma or are grieving a loss, the emotional security a cuddle session provides can be super healing. 

Regular cuddling sessions can also help if you’ve been struggling with feelings of loneliness and isolation. You feel more connected and cared for, which boosts your self-esteem and self-worth. Something that can ultimately encourage you to go into the world and form more human connections.

Benefits to Your Mental Health

Cuddle therapy may look a lot different than traditional talk therapy, but it's proven to be an effective form of treatment for mental health conditions. It eases many troubling symptoms of anxiety and depression, and regular sessions can also improve your social skills (thus making forming and maintaining healthy relationships easier).

Nurturing touch can, for some, alleviate depression, anxiety, and PTSD symptoms while reinforcing a sense of self-worth and security. For older people, disabled, or simply those starved of platonic intimacy, it provides profound comfort.

Over time, positive touch experiences can help you become more emotionally resilient, making it easier to handle challenges and setbacks.

According to Taylor Wilson, a mental health consultant and founder of Active Recovery Companion, people who engage in cuddle therapy report feeling a renewed sense of self-worth and reduced anxiety after just a few sessions. The tangible benefits of professional cuddling go beyond mere physical touch—it's a significant form of emotional and mental health support.

Who Is Professional Cuddling For?

Professional cuddling can be for anyone who wants to receive a platonic nurturing touch in a safe, controlled environment, says Xandria. It's especially helpful for people whose love language is physical touch.

Even if you're wary of physical touch, especially from strangers, professional cuddling can slowly ease you into feeling comfortable. You can go at your own pace and gradually overcome your fear of physical touch.

• If you have chronic stress or anxiety, professional cuddling can be a stress reliever. During a session, you get to disconnect and leave your worries at the door. As you relax into your cuddler’s embrace, your stress hormones dive, making you feel calm and at ease.
• Those struggling with loneliness. These days, loneliness feels like an epidemic, and more people report feeling isolated even when surrounded by loved ones. There’s a rising need for meaningful, physical interactions outside of romantic or sexual settings. And that's where professional cuddling comes in—it provides folks with a safe space to feel connected and less alone.
• Suffer from social anxiety? Those who struggle with social anxiety or find it hard to form personal connections can gain a lot from professional cuddling. The safe and structured environment of a cuddling session allows them to experience positive, non-sexual touch without the pressures of keeping up with social interactions. 
• Cuddle therapy is also very appealing to people who are on the asexual spectrum and would like access to meaningful touch without the pressure of a sexual or romantic relationship. Similar to neurodivergent people, older and disabled individuals tend to be lonelier than the general population and can benefit from cuddle therapy, Xandria adds.

What Does It Take to Become a Professional Cuddler?

No mandatory training or certification is required to become a professional cuddler. But, it’s advisable to go through some training. Licensed clinical social worker Joshua Collins recommends specialized training programs that cover topics like consent, boundaries, communication, and the ethics of touch before becoming a professional cuddler. Though not legally required, having these certifications helps you understand and manage the emotional and physical needs of your clients.

Being Empathetic, Kind, and Understanding

I highly recommend that anyone who wishes to become a cuddle therapist get cuddle-specific training before offering sessions to clients. Xandria says some important traits of a professional cuddler include high empathy, a willingness to learn, strong boundaries, good listening skills, and business acumen (as most cuddle therapists are self-employed).

A good professional cuddler empathizes with their clients and understands why they want to connect physically. Being naturally compassionate and genuinely wanting to help others is a great start. Effective communication is another. You must be clear when discussing boundaries, understanding the client’s needs, and providing reassurance throughout the session. Clear, open, and respectful communication ensures the cuddler and the client feel comfortable and safe.

A Professional Attitude

Maintaining professionalism is also vital with professional cuddling. Your clients are placing many of their emotional needs on you, and you need to be punctual, reliable, and extra careful when sticking to agreed-upon boundaries. Cuddling might seem passive, but it can be physically demanding. Professional cuddlers must be comfortable with prolonged physical contact and have the stamina to maintain different cuddling positions for extended periods. They should also be attuned to body language and nonverbal cues to adjust positions and ensure their clients’ comfort.

While cuddling may seem unorthodox, its therapeutic intentions align with so many psychological principles around attachment, reducing loneliness, developing self/other awareness, and more.

Frequently Asked Questions