What Is My Attachment Style?

This short free 15-question quiz measures feelings associated with the four main attachment styles—secure, anxious, avoidant, and disorganized. This quiz is not a formal medical or diagnostic test and should not be interpreted as clinical or medical advice.

The Attachment Style Quiz

The Four Attachment Styles

Early attachment styles may not be exactly the same as those in adult relationships, but they can be a good predictor of adult behavior patterns. 

Your attachment style consists of a variation of attachment strategies, which strategies show up the most depend on the overall safety you have felt in relationships.

— YOLANDA RENTERIA, LPC

Secure Attachment 

Those of us with a secure attachment style are able to build healthy long-term relationships. A secure attachment generally leads to good self-esteem and the ability to enjoy close relationships, seek social support, and share feelings with others.

Children who develop this attachment style had parents or primary caregivers who were more attentive to their needs. They felt safe, loved, and understood. Securely attached children sought comfort from the parent or caregiver when scared and preferred the comfort of this adult to strangers. 

Research suggests that securely attached children are more empathetic as they get older.

Anxious or Ambivalent Attachment 

Anxious attachment style, also called ambivalent attachment, is a type of insecure attachment. If you have this attachment style, you may tend to be wary of getting close to others and worry whether a romantic partner loves you or not.

Children who are ambivalently attached are typically suspicious of strangers and distressed when separated from a caregiver. But unlike securely attached children, those with anxious or ambivalent attachment don’t seem to be comforted by the parent or caregiver’s return, and they may even refuse comfort.

Avoidant Attachment

Avoidant attachment style is marked by challenges with intimacy and close relationships. If you are avoidant, you might not be willing or able to share thoughts and feelings with others, and may even have problems with intimacy.

Those of us with this attachment style may not invest as much emotion in relationships as others, and tend not to be as disappointed when relationships end. That last part may sound like a good way to protect ourselves from getting hurt (and it is!), but it's also a good way to prevent ourselves from finding meaningful, long-lasting relationships.

Children with an avoidant attachment may have had caregivers who weren’t emotionally available. They may have been left to take care of themselves because they couldn’t rely on a parent or guardian. These children might avoid parents and caregivers and not have a preference between a caregiver and a stranger.

Disorganized Attachment

A disorganized attachment style includes a mix of behaviors. A person with this attachment style might be clingy at one time and emotionally distant at another time. It’s typically a response to parents or caregivers who may have been abusive or neglectful.

A child with a disorganized attachment style might feel both fear and comfort toward a caregiver, which can be confusing.

What Should I Know About Attachment?

Attachment describes the way people form relationships and how they interact and behave in those relationships. Our attachment style is formed during early childhood by the way we interact with our parents or primary caregivers. 

John Bowlby, a researcher credited as a creator of attachment theory, described attachment as "lasting psychological connectedness between human beings." He believed that forming attachment was also part of human survival, and these early childhood experiences shape development and behavior later in life.

Psychologist Mary Ainsworth built on Bowlby’s work with her own study and concluded that there were three main attachment styles. Researchers then added a fourth style.

Who Is This Attachment Style Quiz For?

We all want to know why our relationships work—or don't work, as the case may be. While a number of factors contribute to the success or failure of our long-term relationships, our attachment style represents a possible underlying explanation for our relationship behaviors that we didn't previously understand.

This attachment style quiz is based on the four main attachment styles recognized by researchers and mental health providers. Each response corresponds to a different attachment style.

This quiz can be helpful if you want to learn more about attachment styles, what yours may be, and how attachment could impact your relationships with family, friends, and romantic partners. It can help you better understand your behaviors in relationships and determine if you could benefit from working with a mental health professional to discuss concerns about your attachment.

Is My Attachment Set in Stone?

Remember, it's called attachment theory for a reason. How we act under certain circumstances doesn't define the rest of our lives and all future relationships. So even if you think you have a fix on your attachment style after taking this quiz, know that it may only be one small piece of the puzzle that is your life.

Old behaviors can be unlearned and replaced with new ones, and even a string of unsuccessful relationships doesn't mean you have an insecure attachment style. All it may take is the right person and the right relationship to overturn everything you think you knew about your connection and attachment to others.