Here's What You Need to Know About Cuffing Season and Seasonal Relationships

Chilly weather brings with it a deep craving for cuddling up and getting close with someone else. If you already have a long-term partner, the whole “popcorn and hot cocoa” on the couch thing is a done deal. However, if you’re currently single—or in some sort of “situationship”—you’ll need to get a bit more creative in the romance department to make this cozy wish come true and squash those nagging lonely thoughts.

Enter: Cuffing season, which is the phenomenon of people getting into short-term relationships to satisfy a deep craving for companionship that creeps up during the cold months. It's a controversial dating trend that people love to hate, but it certainly has its benefits.

So how do these seasonal relationships work? And are they ever a good idea? Let’s dive into some of the nuances of cuffing season and the potential benefits and drawbacks of this ongoing season dating trend.

What Is Cuffing Season? 

While there is no official window for it, cuffing season generally takes place from just before the winter holidays through Valentine’s Day, and wraps up just before spring. It’s during this period of winter when people are more inclined to seek romantic relationships out of pure convenience and natural longing.

The idea is to have someone to snuggle up with when the weather’s frightful, to have arm candy for all those holiday soirees, and to enjoy connection and companionship during a notoriously difficult season. 

Sometimes single people enter into these relationships knowingly, with an understanding that the partnership has a likely expiration date once the weather warms up. However, some may fall into a cuffing season relationship without that clear foresight simply because they long to be attached during this time of year.

If the relationship was built on this longing rather than a genuine connection, then it may be more likely to fizzle as that longing fades come spring.

The challenge lies in the fact that most people don't explicitly tell one another that what they're getting into is a cuffing season relationship, and sometimes it turns into full-fledged love...other times someone is left heartbroken.

Why Cuffing Season Can Be So Appealing 

People engage in short-term relationships during this time of year for all the same reasons they get into relationships otherwise. At its core is a desire for companionship and connection. However, the winter season brings with it a heightened longing for these things.  

“People get lonely during the holidays, and they're stressful, too,” says licensed therapist Jackie Golob, LPCC, who specializes in relationships and sexual wellness. “Having to show up and see other cousins, aunts, uncles, married folks, and other family members and friends ask all shameful questions of, ‘How are you still single?’ or ‘Why are you single?’” 

Having a partner during this time of year not only eliminates these invasive questions, but it gives you company for your calendar events and someone to connect with when things get lonely or stressful. 

Is A Cuffing Partner a Good Idea? Pros & Cons 

So, is purposefully entering a short-term partnership like this ever a good idea? What risks are there for your heart, mind, and soul—and for the person entering the fleeting relationship with you?

As with anything, there are potential positives and negatives you should weigh before knowingly participating in a relationship with a no-strings relationship with an expected expiration date. Even if your goal isn't to be in a short-term seasonal relationship, it's important to identify the reasons why you're entering the relationship. Is it because there's a genuine connection? Or are there underlying factors at play?

The Benefits

• It's a casual, low-commitment relationship that removes some of the inherent pressures or stresses of a long-term relationship.
• You can enjoy the joys of company and companionship.
• It offers a guaranteed date to holiday events, like Christmas parties and Valentine's Day dinners.
• These relationships provide someone to enjoy holiday traditions with, such as opening holiday presents or seeing Christmas lights.
• It offers opportunities for physical connection, which are important for our well-being. Studies have shown that having partnered sex is linked to lower stress levels, improved heart health, and greater intimacy.
• There's potential for a meaningful longer-term relationship if you both decide to continue seeing each other. 
• Even if/when the relationship ends, you could have a new lifelong friend given your shared experience. 

The Drawbacks

• You're risking heartbreak if you get attached and the other isn’t on the same page (or vice versa). 
• You may be more inclined to ignore red flags or “force” a connection out of convenience, Golob says.
• Friends and family may put pressure on you to stay in the relationship if they like this person a lot, which can complicate things.
• Even after ending the seasonal relationship mutually, you may experience some heartbreak or confusion.
• You may miss out on another connection with long-term potential if you appear attached or committed to someone else.

Tips for Being in a Cuffing Relationship 

Before entering a cuffing relationship, Golob encourages you to do the following. 

Understand Your Intentions

"Contemplate why you want to enter a relationship during this time, and if it could be that you're seeking a short-term cuffing partner. What is your intention and purpose? Is connecting with this person going to bring you joy?" says Golob. Knowing this for yourself, and relaying it to your partner, helps ensure you’re both on the same page. 

Communicate Clearly

It’s important to communicate clearly from the beginning of your cuffing relationship, throughout its duration, and as you end it. This is true of any relationship, of course, but particularly so in one with less “traditional” parameters. 

“There definitely needs to be rules regarding boundaries, consent, communication, mutual respect, and what is or isn’t OK sexually,” Golob says. That means taking time to talk through these things without jumping head first into the partnership. 

Also make sure that you’re both fully aligned regarding the type of relationship you’re entering together. If only one of you is just interested in a short-term, no-strings attached scenario but the other isn’t, that opens the door for hurt feelings and difficult conversations.

Remain Open

Keep the lines of communication open throughout the relationship. If this person seems like a good fit long-term and you’re starting to catch feels, don’t torture yourself by bottling it up inside. Conversely, if things just aren't feeling right—or you happen to meet someone else—don’t try to force the relationship and remain super clear.